Today is a day I wish I could use Google Analytics to see the variance in numbers between male and female readers. Speaking in general, I think it is safe to say that a majority of women look forward to Valentine’s Day. And perhaps an equally overwhelming majority of men, do not. My reason(s) for not caring for Valentine’s Day actually stem from the fact that I consider myself somewhat of a romantic. I suppose you’ll have to ask my wife for verification. I don’t want anyone – not even the calendar – telling me how, when, or to what degree I ought to love my wife. There are more specific reasons, too… among them are these:
Love Is (often) Silent
Some of the best ways to say “I love you” do not need words. It’s true that actions speak louder than words. And as it relates to love, I know most women would rather SEE “I love you” than merely HEAR it. This is where the concept of Love Languages (click on the link to find this amazing guide) has been so valuable to me in my personal life and in my counseling.
Love Is Consistent
If most of us (regardless of gender) were honest, I’m pretty sure we’d rather feel loved 365 days than 1. While I will be the first to admit that my average is less than perfect, I try to live this way. Love as a lifestyle instead of love as an assignment.
Love Is Creative
Consistently over the years, the gifts that have meant the most to my wife were those that included me listening and investing time and effort to obtain them. Don’t get me wrong, she digs chocolate and flowers as much as the next person (and I try to purchase both throughout the year). I just find it wooden and plastic that every February 14 people all over the world feel loved and appreciated if they have these kinds of things. You’re worth more than that.
So, ladies, don’t settle for 1 day. Find a guy who is willing to love you better than that. And, guys, the only way this works – us saying we hate Valentine’s Day – is if our women know that we love them much more frequently than one prescribed day on a calendar. Go!
PS: We’re still going out to dinner tonight.